And we're off like a heard of turtles

I'm always late. Plain and simple. B.K. (before kids), I was just a little late. If I said I would meet you at 8:00, I'd be there by 8:10 for sure. I never really thought of it as a problem, and neither did my friends or employers. Now Adam, it drove him bananas. Too bad. He should have taken a hint when our own wedding started an hour late. Which, by the way, was so not my fault!

Now that I'm a mom, I don't have a snowballs chance in hell of ever being on time. It's just not going to happen. If we are invited somewhere, we are, at the very least, 20 minutes late. I've been running over an hour late before, and still had the balls to show up. If we are going on a road trip, tack on 2 hours from my said departure time. If we are flying, there's a high probability that we won't make the flight.

Sensing this may actually now be a problem, I decided our next road trip was going to be the one where we shocked everyone by arriving when we said we would. This personal dare was no small task either. Driving 427 miles to Grandpa Mike's house, with all four kidlets in tow, and leaving Adam at home . . . YIKES! But, I like a good challenge and this would be epic if I could pull it off. 

By 11:30 p.m. last night, everything was packed and ready to go. All that was left was to put everything in the car. I felt so proud of my accomplishment! This morning, my alarm went off, and I only snoozed it for maybe 20 minutes. I happened to glance out the window. It was crazy foggy out there, but I didn't think much of it. I hopped in the shower, got ready and started collecting the bags to load into the car. I opened the door, and to my wonderment, I could barely see the big white bus. The fog was so dense and creepy. I woke up Adam. We both agreed that by dawn, which was an hour away, the fog would lift and we'd be on the road. 

Well, that was over three hours ago and here I am, writing this blog. As Lily once told me, "God controls everything. Except Mother Nature. When she shows up, she's the boss." Oh mama N, way to poop on my cake. 

What's in a name?

When I decided to start a blog, I wasn't concerned so much about what I'd write about. The little people in my life keep it plenty interesting around here. What I was flipping out about was the name of my blog. For those of you who know me, you get my angst. Naming people stresses me out beyond belief; why would my outlet for literally prose be any different?

With the kidlets, I worried I would pick the wrong name and the small one would hate me for all eternity. Or the name I loved dearly would go out of style (think Misti, Tiffani, Tammi, or really anything ending in an i). Or, even worse, the kid would change their name. Ouch. Burn. (Oh, wait, I pulled that stunt. Sorry mom and dad.)

So, I did what any creative writer would do: I had a few glasses of wine. I tried this tacit for days. Still nothing. Don't get me wrong, I was all for getting the creative juices flowing. But, that elusive 'ah ha' moment was really starting to tick me off.

Then, one day, I gave up. I told myself that if I'm having this much trouble picking a damn name for my blog, I shouldn't be writing one to begin with. It was actually quite similar to the process of naming my children. With the kidlets, I'd think real hard, maybe even yell the name a few times, just to make sure it rolled off my tongue with some bite. When it didn't feel right, I'd give up.

And then it happened. I was cleaning chocolate milk, grape juice, and other unknown organic material off the entertainment center. I remember thinking, "from a far, she's held up pretty well! See, I CAN be that mom with white furniture!" Then my eye caught several of the permanent pen marks and gouges. "Oh, Raggedy Ann," I thought to myself and smiled. That's it!! That's my name!! Momma bear is gonna be a blogger! Whoo whoot!

Let's quickly rewind all the way back to January 2009. Lily was 20 months old, Leah 5 months. The girls were playing nicely so I walked out of the room for a moment or two. I come back to see my once pristine entertainment center was now the canvas for Lily's abstract art. She had, of course, disposed of the evidence. (I would later find out that the kid hoards pens and glitter glue. Another topic for another day.)

I shot a glance at Lily, "Who did this??? Mommy just got this a week ago!! Bad. Very, very bad!!"

Lily looks me straight in the face, and without the slightest hesitation, says, "Raggedy Ann did it. "

The Cast and Crew

Star #1

Lily Claire

Born: April 2007

Nickname: Lil, cuddle bug

Likes: being the boss, coloring, dinosaurs, cuddles, make believe, chocolate milk, chicken fries

Dislikes: rules, authority, vegetables, time outs

Star #2

Leah Evelyn

Born: August 2008

Nickname: Bear

Likes: everything, especially raggy

Dislikes: wearing her eye patch, getting in trouble

Star #3

Lucille Elizabeth

Born: June 2010

Nickname: Lucy, The Lu, Luster, Bug-a-Lu, bug, small fry (starting to wonder if this kid knows her real name?)

Likes: blankie, paci, super cuddles, music, dancing, diet coke

Dislikes: anything you say no to

Star #4

Charles Lennon Christopher

Born: October 2011

Nickname: Charlie, CLCP

Likes: cuddles, kisses, peek-a-boo, exploration, demolition 

Dislikes: being ignored

Extra

Bella Star

Born: March 2004

Nickname: Bella, Bulldog

Likes: people food, being sassy, spooning, hinder rubs

Dislikes: all other dogs, not getting her way, baths

Amanda

Producer & Director

Nickname: Mommy

Likes: the smell of clean, running, diet coke, wine, bacon, pedicures

Dislikes: chaos, messes, sassy children, snotty noses, ear wax

Adam

The Hubs

Nickname: Daddy

Likes: punctuality, hugs, movies, popcorn, whiskey, science, running

Dislikes: short showers, being tired, idiots

Since I didn't do baby books, I guess I should blog or something

Well, I've jumped on the blog bandwagon. Seems like all the cool kids are blogging these days. And, since I still feel the need to give into peer pressure and be in the 'in crowd', I'm going to start blogging too.

If I didn't have kids, well, I'm not sure what the hell I would write about. I had an awesome life before kids (b.k.), but I must admit, having the little kidlets has really made me a better person. I know, you are thinking I'm going to tell you the typical 'mom' response: 

I didn't know what love was until I held my baby in my arms. Or, staying at home, raising my young children, well, it's the most rewarding job ever. I love getting paid in hugs!!

I'll tell you right now: while that's all true (Wait, hugs? That tender won't work at Von Maur!), my children have provided me with a whole new perspective on life. Where as before, I went by "when in doubt, turn right", I've now added "find the funny . . . find the funny . . . FIND THE FUNNY!!"

You see, if I can't find humor in my daily life, then I'd best be drinking by 9 a.m. Thankfully, on most days, I find that funny. On the off days, well . . . we keep it simple: if by bedtime, I still have a head count of four, then the day was a success. 

This blog is my opportunity to share the true stories of me as a mom, as well as all the shenanigans of my children. There is never a dull moment at the Pricehold, and I hope these stories make you smile and laugh. 

Enjoy!

Amanda